Grief and Heaven

"That is why we never give up. Though our bodies are dying, our spirits are being renewed every day. For our present troubles are quite small and won't last very long. Yet they produce for us an immeasurably great glory that will last forever! So we don't look at the troubles we can see right now; rather, we look forward to what we have not yet seen. For the troubles we see will soon be over, but the joys to come will last forever."
2 Corinthians 4:16-18 NLT

I got this off a website of a woman who lost her six year old son in June. She constantly amazes me how strong in her faith she is. She was talking about how much she looks forward to Heaven now, knowing that he is there. I also watched the Terri Irwin interview last night and her faith touched me also. She was saying that she knows that Steve's death happened for a reason and she knows she will see him again.

How bittersweet is death when you are a Christian? How can you grieve when you know that your loved one is in a place where there is no tears, no pain; only joy and thanksgiving? How can you survive if you don't have that comfort? How can you say goodbye to your child or your husband and believe that the connection you had is gone and they will only live in your memories?

My grandpa told me once that every time he would go see his mom, she'd say, "Foy, is that you?" and he said that he knows that when he gets to Heaven, he's gonna hear, "Foy, is that you?" How can you not rejoice when you hear that? I have a child that I know is being taken care of by Chad's dad in Heaven and I know that one day, I'll get to see her and meet her. (I don't know if she was a girl or not, we lost her too young, but in my heart I know.) Of course, I'll get to meet him too!

I don't mean this entry to be sad, I want you to read it and rejoice. I want you to know that death to God is not bad, it's when He gets to bring you home. Just think how happy you are when it's been a while since you've seen a loved one, that's the way it's gonna be for us. I think the reason we are on this Earth is to decide whether or not we're gonna follow God and then we get to celebrate for all of Eternity if we make that choice.

The "Do" verses...

For I don’t understand what I am doing. For I do not do what I want – instead, I do what I hate. But if I do what I don’t want, I agree that the law is good. But now it is no longer me doing it, but sin that lives in me. For I know that nothing good lives in me, that is, in my flesh. For I want to do the good, but I cannot do it. For I do not do the good I want, but I do the very evil I do not want! Now if I do what I do not want, it is no longer me doing it but sin that lives in me.
Romans 7:15-20

To me, these verses are such a comfort. When you can read them and understand them, you realize that God does get it! I call them the "do" verses because of how often that word is used. Okay...some background, Romans is written to baptized Christians who are trying to live a christian life. He is talking about that all Christians sin and these verses paraphrased by me go something like this...

I don't know why I do bad things. I don't want to, I want to be good and do what I should but I end up doing things that I can't stand. Even when I do bad things, I know that the things that God wants me to do are right. But, now that I am in Christ (baptized and living daily for Him), it's not me (the spiritual) doing these bad things, it's the physical (earthly) side. I know there is sin on earth and I know that as long as I am here, I will sin.

So, I find the law that when I want to do good, evil is present with me. For I delight in the law of God in my inner being. But I see a different law in my members waging war against the law of my mind and making me captive to the law of sin that is in my members. Wretched man that I am! Who will rescue me from this body of death? Thanks be to God through Jesus Christ our Lord! So then, I myself serve the law of God with my mind, but with my flesh I serve the law of sin.
Romans 7:21-25

So, I know what I should do but there are times, I don't do it. Even though I want and know that what God wants me to do is the way to go, there is a struggle between my heart and body. How can I bring these two ways of thinking together? Through Jesus, of course! As long as I give him my heart and soul, He knows that my flesh belongs to the Earth. This is the grace that Jesus gives us.

But!

What shall we say then? Shall we go on sinning so that our grace may increase? By no means! We died to sin; how can we live in it any longer?
Romans 6:1-2

Just because God knows the struggles we face doesn't mean we get a free ticket to act out all of our earthly desires! As you grow closer to the Lord, the struggles will get easier and there won't be temptations put in our path where He won't give us a way out. This is just so reassuring knowing that we don't have to be perfect and God isn't up there with a check list going, "Boy, you sure messed that up!" Doesn't that just make you feel good? This is what God meant for it to be - reassuring.

Amen!!!

I got this in my email this morning and I love it.

Our God is a Good God
by Max Lucado
“You are good, LORD. The LORD is good and right” (Ps. 25:7–8).
“Taste and see that the LORD is good” (Ps. 34:8 NIV).

God is a good God. We must begin here. Though we don’t understand his actions, we can trust his heart.
God does only what is good. But how can death be good? Some mourners don’t ask this question. When the quantity of years has outstripped the quality of years, we don’t ask how death can be good.
But the father of the dead teenager does. The thirty-year-old widow does. How could death be good?
In God’s plan every life is long enough and every death is timely. And though you and I might wish for a longer life, God knows better.
And—this is important—though you and I may wish a longer life for our loved ones, they don’t. Ironically, the first to accept God’s decision of death is the one who dies.
While we are shaking heads in disbelief, they are lifting hands in worship. While we are mourning at a grave, they are marveling at heaven. While we are questioning God, they are praising God.
But, Max, what of those who die with no faith? My husband never prayed. My grandpa never worshiped. My mother never opened a Bible, much less her heart. What about the one who never believed?
How do we know he didn’t?
Who among us is privy to a person’s final thoughts? Who among us knows what transpires in those final moments? Are you sure no prayer was offered? Eternity can bend the proudest knees. Could a person stare into the yawning canyon of death without whispering a plea for mercy? And could our God, who is partial to the humble, resist it?
He couldn’t on Calvary. The confession of the thief on the cross was both a first and final one. But Christ heard it. Christ received it. Maybe you never heard your loved one confess Christ, but who’s to say Christ didn’t?
We don’t know the final thoughts of a dying soul, but we know this. We know our God is a good God. He is “not willing that any should perish but that all should come to repentance” (2 Pet. 3:9 NKJV). He wants your loved one in heaven more than you do. And he usually gets what he wants.

I would like to clarify that Mr. Lucado obviously believes that you just have to say the "Sinner's Prayer" to get into Heaven and I personally believe that baptism is a necessity. But to me, this article says that there are things between a human heart and God that we don't know anything about.

God's Design of a Helper

This study can be found here.

The heart of her husband has confidence in her,
And he has no lack of gain.
She brings him good and not evil
All the days of her life.
Proverbs 31:11-12

1. Man was made in the image of God.
2. They were to rule over the fish, the birds, the livestock, the earth and all creatures.
3. God told them to be fruitful and multiply, fill the earth and subdue it.

God made this whole world for us. He made it so that we could create all the things that man has created. And he put us in charge of it.

God made woman to complete the man. She's to help him.

New Bible commentary:
The husband and wife complement each other. Suitable helper would be better-translated ‘helper matching him’, i.e. supplying what he lacks. She is his missing rib. Matthew Henry commented on God’s choice of a rib to create Eve: ‘Not made out of his head to top him, not out of his feet to be trampled upon by him, but out of his side to be equal with him, under his arm to be protected, and near his heart to be loved.’ Perhaps this reads a little too much into the rib, but it expresses well the biblical ideal of marriage.

"In Genesis 1 woman is part of God’s plan to create mankind in His image, along with the man. In Genesis 2 she is the companion and “helper” (NASB) or “companion” (NET) to her husband. Man was never intended to be complete apart from the woman; she is his perfect partner. Both are made in God’s image and likeness. Both are to rule and exercise dominion over all of creation. Genesis 1 relates God’s purposes for all of mankind, our overall responsibility on earth. Chapter 2 describes the relationship of husband and wife. "

Psalm 121:1-2
"I lift up my eyes to the hills-
where does my help come from?
My help comes from the Lord,
the Maker of heaven and earth."

If God can be a helper, then it's not a place of submission.

Proverbs 31:10-31
The wife supports the husband by bringing him good, clothes, feeds, buys property, plants a vineyard (brings in income), she trades, she creates, she gives to the poor, she sells cloth, she has strength, dignity, wisdom, humor and faith. She takes care of the house, her kids and her husband. God knew woman would work so hard for their family so he set this example up of how a man should appreciate her. This isn't some example women will never reach, it's God knowing that we would work without ceasing. He knows and He appreciates.
I've never read that passage and realized that.

Clarity

I had a moment of clarity at church Sunday and it's one of those thoughts that I need to keep in my head all the time.

Do not be proud of your relationship with God. Take pride in it, definitely, but don't think that just because you have one, you are better than anyone else. I wish I knew how to line out words because I was thinking of this last night and I don't agree with even taking pride in it. Instead, thank God every day that you have one. Thank God that he wants us to love him and be with him. Thank God that there is no goodbye and that we can all live with him and each other for eternity.

And what is so scary, is that there is such a fine line in those two things and it seems to me the only difference sometimes is the tone of voice. You've heard it, that oily tone that takes over when we talk about how we're doing something and we just happened to notice someone else not doing it. If it turns me off, think how it turns off people searching for the Lord.

September 11th

"I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world."
John 16:33

"I consider that our present sufferings are not worth comparing with the glory that will be revealed in us."
Romans 8:18

I can't put into words what I want to say, so I'm just gonna let these verses speak for me today. See how the first part guarantees that there is suffering but the second part says that there is so much more out there for us?

I hope we all remember the victims and families of 9-11 today and remember that this part is hard but "God has all of eternity to make up for it."*



*My minister said that yesterday and I like it!

God's Design for Oneness

This lesson can be found here.

Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh. - Genesis 2:24

Three things that characterize a marriage:
1. Leaving your mom and dad
2. Joining your spouse
3. Becoming one

The original Hebrew word cleave means to weld or glue. That means that it is something that is put together and meant to stay together. When you weld or glue something together, it isn't a temporary bond, it's meant to replace and become a new thing.

Ruth 1:16-17
...Where you go I will go and where you stay I will stay. Your people will be my people and your God my God. Where you die I will die and there I will be buried...

I am incredibly close to my parents but Chad is my first thought and priority. I followed him to Florida from Oregon without a thought of leaving my parents. It's taken us a while but I think we rely more and more on each other than we used to. I don't consider myself independent from Chad on the important stuff and if I do, I don't mean to. I really try to work together with him in all ways. One thing I have learned in my marriage is that the marriage comes first before me or Chad. You know that saying, there are three sides to every issue - yours, theirs and the truth. Well, to me, my marriage is the truth. My opinion may not count and Chad's may not count but I'll do what I have to do to make the marriage count. I don't go behind Chad's back at all. I have to be honest with him.

Proverbs 31:11-12
Her husband has full confidence in her and lacks nothing of value. She brings him good, not harm, all the days of her life.

I can say with full confidence that we live out those verses.

I try really hard not to usurp Chad's authority in front of the boys and we do discuss our parenting techniques, I give him my reasons and he gives me his. I try to always keep first and foremost in my mind that he's making them into men. I am too, but he is their main role model and I'm not a man. Neva was saying that Morgan was a really good boy and I agreed and then said that I thought Chad was too hard on him and she goes, "maybe that's why he's such a good boy." I'm so glad she said that because it's absolutely right. My boys aren't good because of just me. It's both of us that have created good kids.

As for putting Chad first before the kids, I try to do that too. The kids are gonna grow up and leave and I still want a healthy relationship with Chad when they are gone.

Your husband is your other half. Together you create a whole and that doesn't mean that either one of you is more important or anything. I love Chad and I will go out of my way every day to make him happy. Not because I have to but because I want to. I want him to look at me and know that his happiness is important to me. It's so easy to get carried away with the whole selfish outlook of "it's all about me and what about my happiness?" but I tell you, I am happier because I have a happy man. We appreciate each other and it's because we both work at it.

Dear God, help me to always put my marriage first. Help me to be the wife that You want me to be to Chad. Help me to be a good example to my boys of what a wife should be like. Thank you so much that I have a man that appreciates me and really tries to be the best husband he can be. In Jesus name, Amen.

Going in a new direction.

I wanted this to be a book by book study guide on the bible but I just can't do that. More importantly I wanted this to be my time to study and be in the Word and honestly, going over stuff I've already gone over is boring to me. So, I found some bible studies at www.bible.org and I've decided to go from there.