Morgan Musings...

This isn't a post about a thought I had that turned into an epiphany, it's about my oldest son Morgan. Morgan is five and wonderful. We had a conversation today that is a pretty good example of conversations we have about once every couple of weeks and I thought to myself that I had to write this one down to remember how he once thought.

Morgan: Mom, what if I was a race car driver and I broke my arm? Would I be able to work or eat?
Mom: Yeah, you could use your other arm.
Morgan: Well, what if I broke both arms?
Mom: Then I guess someone would have to feed you.
Morgan: Once they started to heal, could I go back to work?
Mom: Yeah.
Morgan: What if I got into another wreck and broke my arms again?
Mom: Then you should probably look for another job.

A couple minutes later...

Morgan: When I turn 16, maybe Matthew and I will go hunting.
Mom: Maybe.
Morgan: What if we saw a bear and I had to tell Matthew to shoot it and he shot it, would that be good?
Mom: Yep, but only if it's attacking you.
Morgan: If it was attacking us we would call 911, I mean the fire department and they would come and spray water on it.
Mom: (Duh...finally getting in on the fun stuff of asking questions back!!) What if the bear was on fire?
Morgan: Then the firefighters would put him out and he would probably be dead.
Mom: What if we set him on fire? (I know, I'm not sure what I was thinking!!)
Morgan: Can we do that?
Mom: I don't know, the next time we see a policeman we need to ask him whether or not it's illegal to set bears on fire...I think it is.

I just love the fact that he can talk for hours about anything. Of course, there are those times when all I want to do is hear the last two minutes of a really good movie and he wants to know something totally off the wall but for the most part, I love hearing what he has to say!

Five things...

I knew I should have just gone to Allrecipes.com to look up a recipe for bruschetta, but no, I had to stop by my MIL's blog to see what's going on and I was tagged. So, my five things are...

1. I was a volunteer firefighter for a small North GA town when I was in my early 20s. It was great fun and I actually got to put out fires and do a search and rescue after some tornados on Palm Sunday.

2. I have flat feet. I don't know where that came from but it's true!

3. I have four older sisters, three older brothers and one younger sister but I'm the only child born from my parents. (The wonders of previous marriages and one adoption!)

4. I'm seven years older than my husband and only 11 years younger than my MIL, she is only a year older than my oldest sister.

5. I have a tattoo of Dumbo the elephant on my left ankle. My husband and I went down on our third or fourth date and got tattoos. They weren't matching - we wanted our relationship to last!! :P

Okay, that's all! I'm not sure who all reads this so I'm not gonna tag anyone....yet!

Friendship...

How does that saying go about friends being like silver and gold? Oh, I found it...

Make new friends but keep the old

One is silver and the other gold.

I have a couple of friendships that have been refined and mellowed to a beautiful gold. My oldest friend is from third grade. We were eight when we met and the last time I saw her, we were looking at our three year old boys saying that in five short years they would be our age when we had met. How does that work? That just last year we were in my mom's LeBaron driving home illegally because we were only 15 and my parents trusted me enough to let me go. That only last week a couple of years had gone by and we hadn't spoken and I was scared that our friendship had reached the end or that only yesterday we were sitting in her living room watching our kids play? What made us hold on? What kept us from just not taking the time to write or call? I can't put my finger on it but I know that something amazing has kept us through the great times, the hard times and all the times in between. Like I said, this friendship has been refined to a beautiful gold.

Then there is my second oldest friend. I've known her since seventh grade when friend number one was at another jr high. We had probably three years where we were all about each other. We wrote notes all day during school and then called and talked for two - three hours at night. We've seen each other maybe twice in the last 15 years yet when we are together, it's like no time has gone by and we are right back in the rhythm of our friendship.

These two women have been such a blessing to my life. What is interesting is that religion has been a factor in both of these friendships. I wonder if that's had anything to do with their staying power? One of the best memories of my wedding is before I walked down to meet my dad, my bridesmaids and I had prayer and these two women were there. I just remember being so joyful and a big part of that joy was having these women there that day. I'm trying to tie this post in with a deep thought but I just can't! So, I'm rambling with tears in my eyes because I am so lucky to have people in my life who love me for who I am and I just wanted to take today to tell about two of them.

I guess I'll go eat worms....

I've been dealing with neighbors the last couple of months and it finally all came to a head last week and the end result is that my boys can't play out front anymore. It's your ordinary, run of the mill disagreement between how our children should behave and how it should be enforced and I'll leave it at that.

So, this has really thrown me for a loop because I am a people pleaser from way back. I've never been one to force people to listen to my side of things and I literally have to stop myself from going against what I want to make others happy. But, I've had a lot of truths come out of this situation too.

1. My boys don't have to play with every child they know and when it comes right down to it, it's my job to make sure they play with kids that have a lot of the same standards that we do.

2. I can't force my kids to be the bad guys to make other people happy. I have to be their advocate and stand up for them even if it makes me unpopular.

3. I will make my kids take full responsibility for their actions, even if they have every right to choose those actions.

I still haven't worked it all out because I am hurt and I do want to blame it all on them but I'm trying really hard to look at it as objectively as I can so I don't miss an opportunity to teach my boys a lesson or learn a lesson about myself because I've never been in this situation where I'm responsible for my kids' action on other kids. But at the same time, I have a strong feeling that I am in the right and I want them to know it! Ugh...I'm rambling but I want my boys to be able to play with the other kids and I want to be able to chit chat over the fence with my neighbors but that can't always happen. The phrase "set apart" keeps popping into my head and I know that I am set apart from them. I don't accept the same things they do and I don't parent the same way they do. And that's okay. Just because I don't agree with them doesn't mean that I'm better than they are or that I'm even right. I just have to know that I'm doing everything I can to keep the situation as "clean" as I can and not let myself fall into the trap of being nasty because I'm mad. It's just hard to be on the outside sometimes.

Happy New Year!

I know I'm way late. I just have had so much on my mind and it's all been negative. It's hard when you feel like you can't say anything positive because there is so much yuck (what's the opposite noun word for hope?) in your brain. I do know that I haven't been spending near the time I need to with my God, which is probably why I've felt so bad. But, I can't live like that. I have to feel happiness and hope in my life. So, once again I handed over my problems to God and this time, I really wish I'd stop taking them back! He handles them so much better than I do.

The other day, I noticed something that made me stop and think. Matthew wanted a bottle of water. He hardly ever drinks out of a bottle, he is usually just fine with a cup. I didn't want to give him the bottle because I knew he would take maybe two drinks out of it and then the rest would be spilled or whatever. So, he cried and cried and whined and pouted until I finally gave in and gave him that stupid bottle and sure enough he drank one drink and that was it. How many times do we make a big deal over something so minor that our whole world is turned upside down until we get it and then realize that it wasn't what we needed anyway. Matthew didn't want water, he probably needed a nap or a hug or something but that bottle of water received the focus of all his needs and so it became more important than it actually was.

It spoke to me because I need the Lord. I get along great when my goal during the day is to be with Him and to be like Him. But there are times when slowly but surely, I turn my head to look at something else and start concentrating on it when before I know it, I'm yelling and whining for a bottle of water when what I really need is just a drink from His word or a moment or two in prayer.

"Jesus answered, "Everyone who drinks this water will be thirsty again, but whoever drinks the water I give him will never thirst. Indeed, the water I give him will become in him a spring of water welling up to eternal life."
John 4:13-14